Brian Hamill

He says he felt like “Death in sweatpants and Hoka Sneakers.” Brian’s doctors informed him that he needed a new liver and got him on the waitlist. During the months of waiting, he struggled through a lot and was grateful to have the support of amazing friends and family: “My friends opened their home to me, no questions or conditions. I was managing my care, transportation, meds, appointments, and travel by myself, but my family was there in moral support.” Despite that support, he shares that the process was still lonely, scary, and exhausting. 

Luckily, he only ended up needing to wait 30 days before a donor was found, a small miracle that Brian could barely believe: “I was a mish-mash of dissociation and emotions; elation, trepidation, anxiety, relief & grief. And it felt like it was happening to someone else.” He shared the complex range of feelings that ran through him as he reconciled with the fact that some folks wait years for that call and expresses a deep gratitude to the unknown donor. 

“I still have no idea who they were. But I do deal with survivor grief and feel a duty to make that gift, and my second chance, mean something.” Brian goes on to share that while he has never gotten to learn who they were, he feels a sincere duty to make his second chance that much more meaningful: “I feel like I have the responsibility of living and working for two; it needs to mean something beyond just living to see another day.” He encourages those considering becoming a donor: “Your gift will matter when the worst circumstances have befallen a complete stranger and give them the chance to bloom in a second spring.”

To those reading who are awaiting transplant, or may someday find themselves there, Brian recommends that you “listen to the care team. Advocate for self and do the research to be an informed patient. Be diligent, be focused, be gentle with yourself.” 

Brian has a celebration planned for his transplant anniversary, including fireworks and a band. “I’m a different person,” he shares proudly, “since this journey began, I’ve lost more than 200lbs. My joints don’t hurt. I am getting back into the outdoors and can walk miles uphill and not be winded. I am kinder to myself and others.”